Thumbs Up Emoticon: The F*ck You of the Texting World

I have been told to fuck off many times in my life. I have been spit at, and at one point, an article I wrote had half of Estonia looking to kill me (not a joke). So really, I can take bad shit pretty well. But you know what fucking grinds my gears? You know what gets my blood boiling to the point where I start turning green and end up ripping my purple pants into shorts?

When I send someone a text and they fucking send me the thumbs up emoticon as a response.

You fucking kidding me? It has become the passive-agressive ‘fuck off’ of 2018, and it truly belies a cowardice society full of passive pussies. If you use it as an adult instead of communicating your differences with someone, please consider TAKING YOUR OWN FUCKING LIFE! and yes, I’m serious. You are a child somehow inexplicably wearing adult skin and have you no place in this (somewhat) high-functioning society.

What It Says About You

One needs to understand, nothing says “I legit give absolutely no fucks about what you just said” as much as a fucking thumbs up emoticon. It is the epitome of a lazy brush off in every sense, and whoever gets one, I can promise you, they instantly think you are a flaming, fetid cunt, gender be damned.

It is the adult equivalent of getting movied to the kid’s table at Thanksgiving, except by ANOTHER KID (usually wearing an eyepatch when he or she eats so they doesn’t poke their own fucking eye out)!

If you like someone so little to actually send that spit-wad of a response, why not NOT RESPOND? Why not, and bare wiuth me here because this shit gets crazy, why not JUST TOP TALKING TO THEM? WHY IN THE FUCK ARE YOU KIND OF PRETENDING TO LIKE OR HUMOR THEM? It contradicts what the thumbs up response indicates.

And it tells me ONE thing about the sender…

It Is A Pathetic Act of Blatant Cowardice

They clearly do not agree with what you said or have some source of malaise about it, yet, instead of just being, nah, they take the time to send you the thumbs up response, furthering this fake plastic relationship until one of you has the balls or vulva to be like:

Fuck this noise, you suck ass and I’m out!

But here’s the kicker. If anyone said that to me, I would respect the fuck out of them. People are, by nature, passive, swollen pussies. In telling me to fuck off, that also tells me they are respectful enough to be honest with me instead of playing with my balls for no good reason and sustaining a clearly faux relationship.

Step the fuck up, really. If you find yourself flirting with the idea of sending that to someone, figure out which uncle molested you and get past it.

Hating People is Fine, Being Fake Isn’t

This PC culture that has taught all of us to be nice and safe all the time is a joke. There is a reason we are the laughing stock of this world. Collective cowards who pretend to be nice but would fuck over anyone if it got us somewhere. But disliking someone is okay. People for get that, somehow. Don’t stab them, don’t fuck with them but you can dislike people, that is your freedom.

But to play otherwise or vitriolic.

While this is very much a rant, there is good reason for it. The situation in 2018 is gross, really. As a society we have collectively become the old ladies at the hairdressers, and you ladies know what I mean. All acting friendly as fuck in front of each other then talking so much shit once the person  leaves. How do people not collectively know that is base-level, cowardice shit that will get you punched in the face? Like, what is wrong with most people right now?

Any self-respecting person gets told to go away, they will.

But if they come back into the room and hear shit-talking, that is when some of you end up with a fat lip, and you should.

Act Your Age

Honestly, the thumbs up response is weak sauce. It is laughable.  A response someone who has no intelligence or charisma whatsoever shoots out instead of being honest and, wait for it, adult. It is the same pink slime filler McDonald’s uses to fill out the weight max of its burgers. It is ugly, poisonous filler that serves NO PURPOSE at all other than confuse and manipulate people.

And really, if you are an adult in a romantic relationship and you have sent your significant other that ‘thumbs up” one night to be a passive fucker, Ima steal them from you.

No, really, ima fuck your love.

You don’t deserve one.


Featured image by Sarah Reid — Flickr.