5 Reasons Why Women’s Movements Suck

Let me start off with saying kudos to all the women who will no longer let harassment and violence against them continue in the shadows. Thank you, to all the women who have shined a light for the public recently (and since forever) about what we have all known was going on in every industry around the world for many years. Thank you to the men who have supported women’s movements now and in the past and continue to work with women to live equitably regardless of gender- in relationships, businesses, finances and life. We see you and appreciate you.

All of that is right, and logical. Change is good. But as a woman, it sucks to the highest level of sucktivity (Yeah, that’s a word that I just made up, deal with it) that we literally must make picket signs and stand in the streets for hours to convince people who look like us, act like us and ARE us that we have a voice and should be recognized as human beings. It truly does make me feel like at the core of it all, there really is no hope for humanity in general, if the requirement (after who knows how many thousands of years of existence we’ve had) to get things done for HALF OF THE POPULATION ON THE PLANET, is still a damn protest.

Here’s my Top 5 reasons Why women’s movements could not suck harder:

You end up basically mad at yourself.

Why do I have to keep trying to convince my corporation that I deserve the same amount of money for the same amount of work as a person who has a penis? Why? Just make that shit make some sense. And since nothing is changing at your office, you stop having anything resembling a work life balance to try and impress male and female corporate leaders who have no intention of letting you get any further along than you are now to prove you deserve what you should have had in the first place… (Only room for one broad, maybe two, right?)  Now you hate yourself because you’re starting to think that porn stars might be onto something…

Even if your culture gets it right so many others voluntarily continue to get it wrong.

Female infanticide is a real thing. And it’s happening a whole lot of places all the time. So even if you do convince your local school district or office building to be more proactive about inclusion (and in my opinion GENDER should not be considered diversity in the workplace) don’t get too self-righteous because you can turn on the news at any time of the day and see and hear what the entire water ball thinks about people born with vaginas. In some countries, women just got the right to drive cars, in 2017.

Hard sells rarely work.

If all the women everywhere stopped doing everything all at once, clearly the whole fucking game would come to a halt. But who can afford it? Taking off work and hitting the streets to protest doesn’t put food on the table in single parent homes in America and I’m pretty sure that the statistics will show that many of those homes’ head of household is a female. So, what do you do? You can’t just up and quit a gig because of harassment or discrimination or wage disparity because you might not get another job for six months and there is no guarantee that any litigation will be decided in your favor even with proof. You can’t destroy any property in a riot because you don’t own shit and you’ve got a parent teacher conference to attend in two hours. There is a good chance though, if you put your neck out there, someone will chop it off and add you to a list of people who won’t play the game and therefore you have blacklisted yourself. Nobody wants to be forced to do anything even if it is the right thing. Remember trying to get your kid to eat vegetables for the first time? Yeah, you had to clean that shit up yourself. Sure, you can wait for a crowd to join in on the effort but that could take 80 years. And it has.

Scrutiny for the sake of it.

This is the worst part of Movements, anyone who wants to participate in it is put through the ringer. If you ever did anything at all in your life that wasn’t completely perfect, it will be brought to the surface and used against you regardless if every mention of it was sealed by the courts. Now no one can trust or listen to you about this very real issue that is affecting you right now, that you are on the right side of history about because you’ve not always been right. For whatever reason, humans are hardwired to find fault in anyone who has a point to prove. For the most part if you are a female your job is just an ‘emotional childbearing fuck toy’ anyway so the scrutiny is geared toward any sex that you have ever had outside of wedlock, any sexual proclivities outside of the mainstream because those bring in ratings and they will be splashed all over every form of media before anything else sees the light of reform. Not to mention any unpaid parking tickets or taxes will render your argument tabloid fodder and your truth fake news, regardless of gender. So, people who could affect change, keep their heads toward the ground, sit idly by and continue to let horrible things happen to themselves, their coworkers, their families and their neighbors because god forbid anybody ever find out that they smoked pot that once in 1986 at an Aerosmith concert, unsupervised.

People confuse equality with equity. It’s not the same shit.

To illustrate the point, I wear corrective lenses. Equality, would be ensuring that each student had a seat in the classroom. Without my glasses, although I have a seat, I cannot see what the instructor is writing on the board. Since I have medical insurance which covers my lenses, I don’t have to pay out of pocket for them and I can attend the class too. (They give you an eye test, and if you don’t pass it, well, you need glasses to see like everyone else can see.) Equality means sameness. Sameness is useless if everyone isn’t the exact same. But this is not what any minority human being has ever wanted, regardless of how confident they are when they proclaim it. What they want, is equity- fairness. Equity, would be me attending that same lecture in the classroom, with my corrective lenses on. Now I can see, just like all the other students can see. But this is not a fact of our world. Free Tampons, is fairness. Like corrective lenses, half of the population needs tampons for most of their existence on the planet but because something is different about me…hmmm what could it be…I must pay for them, out of pocket, every 28 days, for 40-50 years and they aren’t covered under my medical insurance. Viagra is though and it is not a REQUIREMENT for survival. WHY? (Oh, and there is no need for testing whether or not I’m a chick like with my eye exam, the doctor knew that I was female, the day that they slapped me on the butt in the delivery room and handed me to my momma.)

It all seems like a horrifying hassle and an idiotic process to continually prove that you are a human being to other HUMAN BEINGS. Doing something about this issue is not my problem. The fact that this is still an issue at all is. It truly sucks. I’m so disgusted when I see those documentaries about how females were burned at the stake for being witches just a few hundred years ago and I think to myself, how ridiculous and ludicrous is that? How dumb were human beings at that time in history to even consider murder under those circumstances even rational? I can only make better decisions in the voting booth in my lifetime, and hope that the changes that we institute now will have the little girls of the future in the same utter disbelief about the necessity of women’s uprisings that I’ve felt watching historical depictions of the silent majority gleefully setting uncontrollable girls in our collective past on fire.


Featured image Nynke Vissia — Flickr.